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  • Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

    If you have commentary on the PDF draft, post it here.
    Sister Garrote of Warm Humanitarianism -- The Mean Ronin
    www.greenronin.com
    www.mutantsandmasterminds.com
    nicole@greenronin.com

  • #2
    Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

    (I'm not mentioning people who used to be lower level who are now higher, but regressing seems wrong.)

    Jordan Thymalta seems to be missing the italics on her stat mention.
    Dahn Rey used to be a master, he is now listed as journeyman.
    Jonas Virden used to be a journeyman, he is now listed as apprentice.
    Garek used to be 12th level, expert/fighter. He is now 10th level, fighter/expert.
    Lady Jane used to be a journeyman, she is now listed as apprentice.
    Otto Parsam used to be 15th level, fighter/expert, he's now listed as master. (I realize this isn't contradictory, but you seem to be putting actual class levels for those NPCs who have official stats, and leaving generic level estimations for those you don't.)

    Thomas Kenzil is listed as NE male human master wizard. Most of the others who have a class listed have actual levels listed, not a generic level estimation. He should probably either be listed as a NE male human master or NE male human wizard X.

    Maelsom Brass used to be a female dwarf journeyman, she is now listed as human.

    Cragwipe used to be a fighter 6, he is now listed as journeyman. (Same as Otto)

    Torya Irontooth is listed as CG female half-orc journeywoman noble. (Same as Thomas Kenzil)

    Bianka used to be a necro/cleric/mystic theurge. She is now an alchemist. (Maybe that's a desired change.)

    Nathan Strebeck is listed as N male half-elf master sorcerer. (Same as Thomas Kenzil)

    The man listed and described as Nigel Trent is actually Captain Emery Shent. (If corrected, Carsdayle's description needs to be corrected to Shent instead of Trent as well.)

    At AC 15 and 70 hp, Eudokia's 'Ring of Sorcerers' most certainly does not increase her CR by +1.

    Krovz is listed as a gnome. She used to be a dwarf.

    Argyle McGill is listed as N male human journeyman. He used to be NG male human warrior 3/expert 4.


    I have had to stop on page 154. I will continue when I am able.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

      Bobbin Brandydale used to be a commoner 15. He is now listed as an aristocrat 15.

      Tanko Sandek used to be a rogue 1/fighter 8/paladin 2. (Maybe this is an intentional change.)

      How come we still have lower CR serpent person stats instead of using the Bestiary 2 versions?

      Ilda Torenn used to be a dwarf. She is now listed as a halfling.

      Petra Wallace used to be an 11th level character, expert 9/rogue 2. She is now listed as a 10th level character, expert 10. She also used to be NG. She is now listed as LN.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

        Mr. Wednesday used to be N. He is now listed as NE.

        Alcindar used to be 9th level. (Expert 6/Sor 3). He is now 8th level (bard 8)

        Liam Blackhammer used to be 10th level. (expert 6/fighter 4) He is now 9th level. (Fighter 6/Ari 3)

        Rankin used to be a corsair/ranger/sea dog. He is now just a warrior. (I don't mention all level changes, but going from two PC classes and a PrC to a NPC class seems a big downgrade.)

        Garth Varellion used to be LN. He is now listed as LE.

        Zach used to be a N commoner 3. He is now listed as a NG rogue 3.

        The god of pirates used to be CN. He is now listed as NE. His CN alignment also featured heavily into his flavor text with his treacherous first mate, Yarash. Yarash is also seemingly missing from the list of divine entities. (Despite beings like Abaddon the demon prince being featured.)

        The god of the sea used to be N. He is now listed as CN.
        The god of warriors used to be N. He is now listed as CN.


        Is there any reason to make a belaying pin lower damage than a basic club?

        It's super cool you guys put mythic stuff in the book, even if it was just a tiny bit.

        As a general note, it feels like most of the NPC statblocks over 5th level are very low on AC, saves and hit points for their CR. I'm sure they are low on other aspects of their being as well, but this wasn't really a big priority of my look through, especially since I find it unlikely that anyone is going to head in and drastically revise them at this point in the book's creation. Just wanted to point it out.

        Thanks for the early look at the book. I've loved Freeport since it was just a single adventure, and I'm stilling running adventures in a Sasserine strongly based off of it. I'm glad to have been able to support your Kickstarter, and I'm glad Freeport's not dead. (Even though some of my favorite NPCs are. You killed Poppy Bragg!)

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

          I took the liberty of jumping ahead to the adventure, and then turning back to the beginning; here are my notes so far.

          -Nate


          Page / Note

          8 / The “Golden No Longer” heading is separated from its text.

          9 / The last sentence ends without punctuation.

          16 / Should the name of the spell create water be italicized?

          17 / Should the text in the second column extend all the way to the bottom of the page?

          24 / The “Alleys and Shortcuts” heading is separated from its text.

          25 / The description sold out should be hyphenated.

          26 / The heading “People of Freeport” is separated from its text.

          35 / Awkward: “Bribery, nepotism, and extortion are all considered part life in Freeport.”

          37 / Should grown up be hyphenated?

          39 / For “the rank of “Guardsman First Class”; I think the semicolon should go inside the quotation marks.

          41 / In the sidebar describing private security: “...yet this is most often due fierce rivalries...”

          41 / The Organization header is separated from its text.

          42 / The Advancement header is separated from its text.

          43 / Under the heading Reporting a Crime, “or the burglary of citizen’s home.”

          46 / The text in the first column runs almost to the bottom of the page. Should it?

          47 / “...but rumor holds that they sometimes they exchange slaves...”

          48 / I think there should be a comma after the word minutes in the sentence “Many people find themselves flat broke within hours, if not minutes of arriving.”

          49 / Add the word into after or in “...sending them splashing onto the streets or the swirling waters below.”

          51 / At the bottom of the first column, should off-load be hyphenated?

          52 / The heading at the bottom of the second column is separated from its text.

          56 / Take out the first comma in this phrase: “...his quiet, but undeniable presence hides a very cold, calculating, and daring evil.”

          58 / The heading at the bottom of the first column is separated from its text.

          59 / Awkward: “Karl Wine, a one-handed ex-pirate, won the crumbling building in a game of cards from some years ago.”

          60 / The heading for the Society of Lobstermen is separated from its text.

          64 / Dahn Rey's attribution is separated from his quote.

          70 / Put the colon in closet”: inside the quotation marks.

          71 / Garek's heading is separated from the text.

          72 / In the quotation for “Who's in Port,” the its should be it's.

          72 / Descriptive text for the Brought Forth uses the terms galley and galleon. Should it be one or the other, but not both?

          75 / The Description heading in the stat block for the Fell Thrust isn't formatted.

          76 / The heading for the Struckhero seems smaller than that for other ships, and is separated from its text.

          82 / In this sentence, the pronoun shifts genders: “But if someone walks up to him and says the right phrase, gives him the right amount of money, and has the right amount of desperation on her face, Dorn leads him back into the shadows, to the door of a drug den and a wide array of illegal narcotics.” (My italics)

          82 / In the quote regarding the Dead Pelican, should the first yer have an apostrophe?

          85 / The Key Figures heading is separated from its text.

          86 / The sentence “The PC(s) are among those who receive fancy invitations...” doesn't work if it is just one PC. Perhaps it could be something like “The PC(s) and other receive...”

          88 / The heading for the Freeport Fishery & Market is separated from its text.

          104 / The heading for Key Figures is separated from its text.

          104 / In the phrase, “Hoping to fulfill Togar’s dream and to prove that orcs can be not just equal but surpass humans in compassion and nobility...” I think the wording should be changed to “can not just be equal but surpass...”

          105 / Awkward: “...strung up with a network of open canopies tent poles...”

          107 / The heading for Key Figures is separated from its text.

          110 / This sentence switches moods: “As one passes by the Reclamation Project Compound at night, if he were to pause a moment and look toward the jungle’s edge, an unusual sight unfolds.” Could it be reworded to read as “...if he pauses a moment and looks to the jungle's edge...”?

          110 / The text at the end of this chapter runs off of the page and is incomplete.

          112 / Awkward: “While protection in most places is a racket, however, Finn’s Syndicate actually does keep other thieves and criminals out of the Eastern District...”

          120 / The heading for Nathan Shrediig is separated from its text.

          120 / Sentence fragment: “Assuming he ever gets there.”

          129 / This sentence is missing a the: “...the Watchmen on the street, however, have been told not to worry about Warg Company.”

          129 / The Description heading is separated from its text.

          134 / I think “well-appointed” should not be hyphenated.

          139 / I think the to do in “on the Sea Lord's to do list” should be hyphenated.

          140 / Add a in the middle of “Alistair is in his late fifties, thin, with narrow features and * head of wild, dark grey hair.”

          140 / I think trumped up should be hyphenated.

          141 / The phrase “to simply do” uses a split infinitive.

          141 / A sentence in the description of the Tombs uses the word countless twice.

          142 / The phrase “to either escape or keep in contact” uses a split infinitive.

          143 / The History heading is separated from its text.

          144 / Under Key Figures, the word fund should be found.

          144 / In the description of Tabima Navaskar, the phrase “if anyone were to ever need information” uses a split infinitive.

          149 / There's a to missing from “Of course, ZirZuard could also hire the PCs explore for another unrelated map project...”

          149 / The Key Figures heading is separated from its text.

          150 / In the phrase “Standing two-stories tall...” there should not be a hyphen.

          156 / The Adventure Seed on this page shifts from past to present tense.

          158 / I think there's a to missing from the phrase “...fully realizing they are barrier between Freeport and the rest of A'Val.”

          159 / The attribution for Dirk Haslinger is separated from the quote on the previous page.

          161 / The Woman's quote is split between pages.

          164 / In the sentence “The market is far cleaner then the surrounding shanties...” then should be than.

          169 / “The Quill is fine inn and restaurant...”

          170 / The heading for Wilmina Gertz is separated from its text.

          171 / The Description heading is separated from its text.

          172 / The History and Key Figures headings are separated from their text.

          173 / In this sentence--“A fairly young, easygoing wood elf, Sarien’s worries constantly about his beasts getting free within Freeport...”--Sarien's should be changed to Sarien.

          173 / The title for 10. Drac's Endless Rovers is separated from its text.

          176 / The names “House of Gods” and “Hall of Gods” are used for the Fool's Market. Is that okay?

          178 / In the phrase “...but he did not care who he helped...” the who should be a whom.

          180 / In the phrase “...angered that Egil would not step down and gave the title to a more worthy candidate...” gave should be give.

          186 / Should Sister Gwendolyn have a heading in a black bar like Mother Lorilee?

          186 / The Key Figures heading is separated from its text.

          187 / I think Wilford Vinely needs a black-bar heading, too.

          188 / Change man to men in “...one of the most trustworthy man in Freeport.”

          188 / Change: “...so Sir Marmadon is had begun to extricate the chapel from any association with them.”

          190 / Change is to are in “...those who give one stolen coin in twenty to an urchin is said to gain the favor of the God of Thieves.”

          191 / Fix: “She’s wasn’t about to use violence to throw everyone out...”

          195 / Fix: “There that he came to understand that evil comes in many forms...”

          195 / Fix: “Armand also handles the payouts and manages their contacts spies on the street...”

          195 / Split infinitive: “The Swords are careful to never act on any intelligence until they have confirmed it as fact.”

          200 / The quote at the end of page 199 and the start of this one is split between them.

          202 / In the description of Torsten Roth: “...and one of the richest man in Freeport.”

          204 / Fix: “...and their reputations, if note their fortunes and their lives, will be forfeit.”

          204 / The attribution for Bobbin Brandydale's quote is separated from the quote itself.

          207 / Fix: “...clinging to on the arms of foreign ambassadors...”

          208 / The Key Figures heading is separated from its text.

          208 / Fix: “...practicing the craft that has been past down for generations.”

          210 / Awkward: ““Checkered” doesn’t begin to describe the history of its owner calls Maeorgan Manor...”

          212 / The Description heading is separated from its text.

          214 / The attribution for Hirsch's quote is separated from its text.

          215 / Add an a to “...saving its potential victim from the literal translation of * hastily worded wish.”

          217 / Replace the comma with and in “He was always driven by his love of creating better tools, more efficient weapons...”

          218 / Fix: “...the foundry and his own residence are protected by with several clockwork mechanisms that can deploy firearms.”

          219 / Add an a to “...with manicured garden...”

          223 / Make key plural: “Hence, renters are advised to keep a tight grip on their key.”

          225 / Fix: “A wiser woman would accept that her own mistakes got her into this mass...”

          235 / Dangling preposition: “...and wipe their operation out.”

          240 / The Notable NPC's heading in the stat block for the Underside is separated from its text.

          243 / Fix: “...savage brutes who or idealistic fools who...”

          244 / Change build to built in: “Freeport wasn’t the first city build on this location, and it won’t be the last.”

          245 / If this is a spell effect or special ability, should it be formatted differently? “Rather than take their opponents head on, they use 'change shape' to assume the guise of their enemy’s race if possible and lure them into ambushes.”

          246 / The Physical Characteristics heading is separated from its text.

          246 / In the Serpent Person Infiltrator stat block, the Defense heading is separated from its text.

          248 / The rules for creating a degenerate creature are presented here, repeating what's on page 211.

          249 / In the description of the Dregs, two sentences in a row start with the word however.

          258 / The text on this page runs all the way to the bottom, with no margin.

          258 / In the description of Kothar the Accursed: “Once night at port...”

          258 / In the description of Porcelina: “But the devil tricked Chiffley, as devil’s do...”

          266 / The Liberty Movement heading is separated from its text.

          267 / Remove the apostrophe: “If one murder’s another pirate...”

          268 / The Key Figures heading is separated from its text.

          268 / Change then to than in “...(who is younger then she by almost 13 years).”

          271 / The attribution for Andrea Blax's quote is separated from the quote itself.

          272 / The line that should be underneath the title for Helkerna Shipyards is between the two words.

          273 / Add an a to: “...without so much as whisper of protest.”

          276 / Fix: “This halflings they brought in were known to be...”

          276 / The Description heading is separated from its text.

          281 / Add an a to: “The sailors on board were not about to accept woman as their leader...”

          285 / The Defense heading in Masson Francisco's stat block is separated from its text.

          287 / Is Froste's Raiders the name of a group? “...the gift of an orc barbarian during his Froste’s Raiders days.”

          290 / Fragment: “His mother, captive to a wicked elven pirate and slaver, the brutal Allethra Sharpe...”

          290 / The Appearance heading is separated from its text.

          294 / Awkward: “His gang leader image Mendor is one has cultivated while hiding his secret activities.”

          297 / In the stat block for Mister Wednesday, the Defense heading is separated from its text.

          298 / Changed starting to started in “After the Captains’ Council starting moving orc and hobgoblin laborers into Bloodsalt...”

          299 / Split infinitive: “...and he’d like to either wipe them out or bring them...”

          300 / The Appearance heading is separated from its text.

          301 / Fix: “He drills were effective, though...”

          303 / The quote regarding Liam Blackhammer is split between two pages.

          305 / The quote regarding Harcourt Horkel is split between two pages.

          307 / Red Alice's heading is separated from the text.

          312 / In the description of Zach, “Dock's whores” should be “Docks' whores.”

          312 / Fix: “...the common sorts of people the players characters are bound to encounter...”

          312 / The text introduces a guide for interpreting NPC levels, but doesn't provide it. “...which provides a rough guide to character level if needed:”

          316 / In the stat block for a Watch Sergeant, the Defense heading is separated from its text.

          318 / Make hold plural in “...while cargo ships employ merchant marines to safeguard the contents of their hold from pirates, sea devils and worse.”

          320 / In the Expert Footpad stat block, the Offense heading is separated from its text.

          321 / In the Orc Heavy stat block, the Offense heading is separated from its text.

          328 / What kind of action does it take for a serpent person to change shape? Is there an effective level modifier for serpent person characters?

          329 / The Azhari Racial Traits heading is separated from its text.

          331 / Add as to “...welcome the social norms of neighbors such the Ivory Ports...”

          332 / Fix: “Island trolls take only half the normal penalty to attacks rolls...”

          332 / Add to to: “Unlike fast healing, an island troll’s quick healing allows the troll reattach a limb...”

          332 / The Island Troll Alternate Racial Traits heading is separated from its text.

          333 / The Roleplaying an Island Troll heading is split by its line.

          334 / Fix: “Because it is impossible to tell what might small act or event make an impression on an island troll...”

          334 / The Aasimar heading is separated from its text.

          335 / Fix: “...Freeport may be a bit on the wild said.”

          335 / Does the aasimar's SR special ability increase with her class level, in addition to increases granted by choosing the ability multiple times?

          340 / When preparing for a Death Attack, must the freebooter use a standard action on each of three consecutive rounds to study an opponent? This seems to be implied by the text.

          349 / Fix: “...the monster slayer cause all oozes...”

          351 / Fix: “...as a standard action, the monster slayer can make himself completely undetectable to undead.”

          352 / I assume that a monster slayer who uses a slaying blow can thus force two Fortitude saves by its enemy, one for the slaying blow and one for massive damage, if applicable. Is this correct?

          353 / The Weapon and Armor Proficiency heading is separated from its text.

          353 / Is a 1st-level noble with arcane training treated as a 0-level caster? Oh—that's cleared up under the witch/wizard heading.

          357 / This text is in a bullet point, but seems like it shouldn't be: “A noble can spend 1 influence point to do any of the following: ”

          359 / The Weapon and Armor Proficiency heading is split by its line.

          359 / The Spellcasting heading is separated from its text.

          362 / The New Archetypes heading is separated from its text.

          363 / Change who to whom in “A crime boss knows where to go and who to ask to find out secrets...”

          366 / Missing a the: “Disjunction (Su): At 20th level, inquisitor-mage can unravel...”

          366 / The Musketeer heading is separated from its text.

          367 / Should the word class be replaced by archetype? “The musketeer class offers a window...”

          367 / Fix: “...a background of years spend on ships and ocean voyages.”

          368 / Split infinitive: “...to instead gain...”

          369 / Should the quotation for the witch hunter be emboldened like with other quotes?

          370 / Fix: “Other witch hunters were clerics, rangers, or monster slayers who become witch hunters...”

          370 / Comma splice: “The lay on hands ability is not gained until 4th level, they do not gain a mercy at 3rd level.”

          377 / The Plant Evidence heading is separated fro its text.

          379 / Some of the words on the table of new feats are emboldened. Should they be?

          382 / Does invoking the Bizarre Insight feat use up the spell to which it is tied?

          383 / Change then to than in “...so if you would take 13 hit points then an amount of damage required to kill you, the save DC is...”

          383 / The Cloak Fighting heading is separated from its text.

          384 / Is there a limit to the number of times that Counterstrike can be used in one round?

          384 / Does the Dex-based damage bonus provided by Crack Shot stack with the one from the musketeer archetype's perfect shot ability?

          385 / Fix: “Casting a spell while threatened provokes and attack of opportunity.”

          385 / Do the affects of the Divine Blessing and Domain Focus feats stack with each other?

          386 / Awkward: “You cannot have more temporary insanity points at any time a number equal to the highest level of spell you can cast.”

          387 / Change who to whom: “also choose one ally within 30 feet who can see and hear you.”

          388 / The heading for Greater Spell Mastery is separated from its text.

          392 / Fix: “You gain a bonus equal to you Wisdom modifier on the bull rush.”

          394 / It seems like the remaining text for the Wild Swings feat could fit back on page 393.

          395 / Do the affects of the Balanced trait stack with those of the Odd Perspective feat?

          395 / Under Born Marine, clarify: “You do not suffer only half the usual penalties on ranged attacks in heavy winds...”

          396 / If a cleric is channeling positive energy to heal multiple characters with the Font of Life trait, to their benefits stack?

          396 / The second clause in this sentence is a fragment: “You are descended from a long line of successful merchants; the call of the coin in your veins.”

          401 / Add have after or to: “At the end of an encounter, once all enemies are defeated or fled...”

          401 / The heading for the Short-Term Madness table is separated from its text.

          402 / The heading for the Indefinite Madness table is separated from its text.

          402 / Fix: “...but feel no particularly loyalty to promises or decisions made by other personalities.”

          406 / On the weapons table, the word reach is emboldened. Should it be?

          413 / The Services heading is separated from its text.

          415 / In the description for liver tonic is the phrase “On a failed save, the user takes 1d10 points of damage as the marching powder ravages his system.”

          419 / The heading for ranger spells is separated from its content.

          423 / The title for the part crowd spell is separated from its text.

          426 / In the description of the shadow blade spell: “...it may makes a Will save...”

          428 / The heading for Magic Weapon Special Abilities is separated from its text.

          428 / In the description for agonizing weapons it reads, “When a crippling weapon hits...” Should this be changed?

          429 / Fix: “...a tangling weapon can cause a the creature struck...”

          433 / Make spell plural: “While wearing the ring of the osprey, you may cast known or prepared fly or overland flight spell as a swift action.”

          441 / Fix: “...if you hurl one of the loaded die...”

          448 / The Mythic Challenges and Threats heading is separated from its text.

          448 / The Mad Luck heading is, too.

          452 / Is a potion of healing a thing any more?

          454 / Should the words player characters be capitalized?

          458 / The last sentences seems to end abruptly, and it seems some narrative or explanation is needed to transition into the description of the mechanism.

          460 / The missing text seems to be located here. Indeed, it seems that pages 459 and 460 have been switched.

          463 / Should the “Skill Checks” heading be moved to page 465?

          466 / The Dwarf Tough has a description of “humanoid (human)”

          469 / The heading for the table of check results is separated from the rest of the table.

          470 / This phrase is curious: “The party finds stone shrine with little difficulty.”

          473 / The map of the Freeport Opera House is different from that used in the adventure “Rito della Successione.” I assume that is deliberate.

          476 / Should there be a map for the encounter with the void zombies?

          478 / The heading at the bottom of the first column is separated from its accompanying text.

          478 / The phrase “no guard would dare get endanger his fellows so blatantly” seems to need revision.

          480 / The header for Kyrick's stat block is separated from the rest of the information.

          482 / In the description of results for making the Perception check, the description ends abruptly: “Noticing a sudden drop or other danger before”

          483 / This wording seems awkward: “Caught on a crack in the pathway, a worn and rotten belt and holds a blade in a faded sheath.”

          484 / This is awkward, too: “(The owners had no idea there were tunnels beneath the premises and board them up promptly.)”

          488 / A misspelling: “...revealing a 20-foot ladder descending though a shaft to a secret room below.”

          488 / Should Hammer's text on this page (“My first journal...”) be distinguished from the other text?

          488 / The heading for the table of Diplomacy results is separated from the table on page 489.


          493 / Awkward: “The outline of trap door can be found in the base of the stage...”

          493 / Brother Molen is sometimes referred to as he, and sometimes as it.

          496 / Awkward: “Entitled The Blood of the Black Goat, it lists “Erik at Honey Pot” as an importer also mentions “Marcus at Gregor’s” as a chemist.”

          500 / The heading for the table detailing the Diplomacy check is separated from the rest of the table.

          501 / The “Mighty Man” heading is separated from its text.
          Last edited by Nate Christen; 07-14-2014, 09:47 AM. Reason: I added more notes.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

            Hi all,

            Nate and Kain, thanks for taking the time to look the manuscript over. It's a huge help!

            Kain - Regarding NPC levels in general, we found that there were a disproportionate number of "master" levels, so as a principle, we tried to look for places where we could bring the power level down a notch or two. Of course if you have a pre-existing game based on earlier versions of the material, then you can and should adjust levels accordingly so they remain consistent (read: higher). In some cases, we also tweaked class levels where it seemed appropriate based on character descriptions from the text. There are a few cases where we intentionally left a class in an NPC listing (such as Thomas Kenzil listed as "NE male human master wizard"), but only where the class mattered; otherwise, we defaulted to leaving the class out.

            Cheers,
            Scott

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

              p. 1, Credits: 1) Is Chris Pramas not listed under Freeport Contributors, 2000-2007, because he is the setting creator?
              2) In the copyright paragraph, "Pirates Guide to Freeport" should be "The Pirate's Guide to Freeport".

              p. 3, Table of Contents: Under Chapter Fifteen, Freeport Races, "Island Trollls" should be "Island Trolls".

              p. 395, Born Marine: In the first sentence under Benefits, delete "do not".

              p. 413, Services: "Ship's passage" should not be indented.
              Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
              Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
              Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
              Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
              Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

                Originally posted by Kain Darkwind View Post
                How come we still have lower CR serpent person stats instead of using the Bestiary 2 versions?
                This is my personal opinion, and highly UN-official, but I think the short answer is: Because the version without racial HD is canonical to the Freeport setting, and thus best supports its fanbase. GMs who wish to use other Freeport material featuring serpent people will have a much easier time adapting those sources to Pathfinder if the default assumptions about how the race works remain the same within the product line.

                For a longer answer, here's more of my reasoning: Making the Bestiary 2 version the new default would require Freeport GMs to own another book (or consult the PF SRD) to run one of the longest-standing elements of the setting, rather than giving them that material in the city sourcebook. Also, Freeport serpent people were originally designed as a challenge for low-level characters that would scale in power as the heroes advanced in level through the Freeport Trilogy and beyond. The Bestiary 2's serpentfolk start at CR 4, which makes them problematic foes for beginning characters, especially for GMs who wish to convert the original Trilogy to Pathfinder. As an example, a single Bestiary 2 degenerate serpentfolk (CR 4) is as much of a challenge as the entire band of degenerate serpent people warriors appearing in the final chapter of Death of Freeport (CR 1 each in the KS draft).

                (More coming. Forgive the placeholder; I've having some technical issues posting the rest of my comments.)
                Last edited by timemrick; 06-03-2014, 12:53 PM.
                Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
                Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
                Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
                Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
                Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

                  (continued...)
                  However, with that said, part of the appeal of Freeport is its inclusiveness. Serpent people are an ancient race, and those featured in the Trilogy are not necessarily the only surviving children of Yig that exist in the world. Freeport serpent people and Bestiary 2 serpentfolk may simply be two different lines of descent from the race's original form, or the GM may decide that one version is the "pureblood" stock and the other a lesser offshoot. Friction between the two groups could generate a number of meaty adventure hooks--much as the yuan-ti cult of Yig did in certain v.3.0 Green Ronin products.
                  Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
                  Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
                  Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
                  Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
                  Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

                    pp. 329-331, Azhar: The first paragraph states that "azhar" is plural, "azhari" singular, but almost every instance of the race's name between that sentence and Azhar Characters (on p. 330) uses the wrong one. These errors seem to lie entirely in the new text written for or adapted to the Pathfinder rules; the non-crunch text, which has not changed since the d20 Freeport Companion, is fine.
                    Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
                    Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
                    Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
                    Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
                    Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

                      pp. 334-336, Unusual Races: I assume that ifrits do not appear here because the azhar fill that niche in Freeport, but why do undines not appear here? It seems natural that humans with water elemental ancestry would visit the Serpent's Teeth more often than some of the other races in this section.
                      Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
                      Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
                      Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
                      Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
                      Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

                        pp. 2-3, Table of Contents: Add entries for License and (hopefully!) Index to the end of the TOC.
                        Chapter Fourteen: Generic NPCs appear after Notable Personae and Other Characters.
                        Chapter Sixteen: Add "Gods of Freeport" after Alternate Class Features.
                        Chapter Seventeen: Add "New Settlement Rules" after Curing Madness.
                        Chapter Eighteen: Move Services between Armor in Freeport and Special Substances and Items.


                        p. 76, Struckhero: This header is the wrong size.

                        p. 416, New Posions: "Posions" should be "Poisons".

                        p. 508, [license]: This text is incomplete.
                        Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
                        Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
                        Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
                        Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
                        Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

                          pp. 191-193, Temple of the God of Pirates: Under History, in the second sentence of the second paragraph, delete either "when" or "as".

                          p. 244, Dwellers Below: In the second sentence, "build" should be "built".

                          pp. 247-248, Degenerate Serpent Person Warrior: Delete the SQ line; this degenerate lacks sufficient Charisma to use change shape (see Serpent People as Characters, p. 328).
                          Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
                          Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
                          Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
                          Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
                          Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

                            pp. 371-372, Retribution Domain: Under Domain Spells, "wrath" should be italicized.

                            p. 372, Unspeakable Domain: The semi-colon in "insanity; mass" should be a comma.

                            p. 373, Gods of Freeport: As I understand it, normal Pathfinder usage is to assign a certain number of domains to each god, then a certain number of subdomains tied to those domains (5 and 6, respectively, for deities appearing in the Core Rulebook and Advanced Player's Guide). Many deities in the Gods of Freeport table have as few as 3 domains, and there are no choices given between domains and their associated subdomains. This seems overly limiting.

                            Subdomains not appearing in the APG (Arson, Entropy, Fear, Flotsam, Scalykind, Torture, Whimsy) should probably be marked as such, but only Scalykind is so identified.
                            Last edited by timemrick; 06-09-2014, 04:37 PM.
                            Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
                            Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
                            Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
                            Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
                            Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Kickstarter Draft PDF commentary

                              Unlike the Freeport Companions, this book has no bestiary chapter. Will the new monsters presented in Creatures of Freeport and several other Freeport titles be converted for Pathfinder in a later book?
                              Tim Emrick, Freebooter, Keeper of the Freeport Errata
                              Winds of Freeport: my Pathfinder Freeport campaign (2014-2016).
                              Time of the Tarrasque: my next Pathfinder campaign (under development).
                              Studded Plate: my blog about RPGs, LEGO, and other geeky subjects.
                              Thastygliax's Vault: my other gaming pages.

                              Comment

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